This week’s experiment is based on recommendation of Gabby Reece. As with most of the women in Tools of Titans, I didn’t know her before, but she’s really inspiring – smart, kind and beautiful.
The piece I like the most was:
Weight of the sacrifice* is based on the individual.
*I don’t like the word “sacrifice” because it has been misused so much – whether it’s sacrifice *expected* by religions, or how society tells us we are here to sacrifice for others. On my books there is no virtue in imposing “sacrifice” externally, it should be something given willingly. So to avoid confusion, for this experiment I define “sacrifice” as “amount of effort given”.
The difference shown in one silly example. Sometimes colleague sitting next to me starts his day with breakfast that I find smelly. When that happens, instead of complaining or asking him to eat his food somewhere else, I move to one of the meeting rooms. Is that a sacrifice? Not really. I I enjoy sitting in a meeting room – it’s quiet and has nice view.
Gabby has her examples to explain the different weights for different individuals [as highlighted in my kindle copy]
But you may be asking: “What is exactly the point of such knowledge?”. It’s not to compare who gives how much, keep tabs and then ask for the debt to be paid.
It’s to better understand each other. And I think it could help me to work with something that gives me trouble – my impatience.
I tend to forget that if something is easy for me, it doesn’t mean it’s easy for everybody. It forms my expectations, and then I get impatient, and unpleasant as a result.
If I can train myself to be more aware of how different people need to put different amount of effort to do/achieve the same thing, I will be able to appreciate the efforts of others more, and then act with more empathy and compassion.
Or as Gabby puts it: “Let’s understand who the person is and how much it means for them, and receive it that way.”
So my experiment for this week is
- Notice the differences in effort of different people I will interact with (with the meaning above)
- Write down cases that I noticed
- In the evening ponder whether there were cases that I wasn’t able to notice
- At the end of the week think if it had positive effects on how I communicate with people, especially how impatient I feel